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At my age I’ve come to the conclusion that love and sex for me are totally different. I’m in a relationship with a lady who I love but at her age sex is painful so we don’t have intercourse and I show love in different ways. Sex for me is a very important part of my life, but is purely physical and not emotional. I am definitely thankful for the ladies of HX who appear to be passionate about intimacy with me.
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LngbdSR: I truly appreciate this sentiment I think it is wise and compassionate about how partnerships change over time and how you can compartmentalize things for love, health, and fun. You sound like a wonderful partner in both respects.
I agree about the sex and love part, I am finding it easier to separate the two as I get older but also I am finding it necessary to do so as well.
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Women are incapable of loving anyone, except possibly their own offspring (and that is not always certain). It's necessary for the continued genetic fitness of the species, but it definitely takes all the fun out of romance once you realize it. But hey, that's why we're here, right boys?
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LngndSR: that you for the thoughtful post. I have a similar situation where a physical relationship is just not possible and also appreciate the kind and talented gals on this site.
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Jwood2722: I am not sure I would say women are in capable of love, I have an amazing ability. Like the kids say, I know ball.
But rather, love is an ideal and just doesn't manifest for me that much anymore. At least not like it did before, and I am happy for that. I was a little too trusting in who I gave my heart to in the past.
And honestly I am not sure love knows gender, love is just an act. It's an emotion, its passion and empathy. It's a lot of stuff, but I highly doubt its gender based. That is just my opinion though I do not know that actual science on that.
EHL2.0: I was born in the 80's and so I do not know that life. But I agree with you that we have a strange trajectory happening with the sexes.
And I would add that there are a lot of bi men as well. And that is ok. Diversity is what makes life colorful.
And as a bi girlie, I never complain about having a lot of options 
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I dunno bro, we’re all fucked
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The problem with Science is that it is controlled by men. So, on this subject I'd expect them to be 99% wrong.
I'm going to an event in a couple of weeks, I'll ask a couple if I run into them. Problem is their answers usually lead to self-discovery. Which is good, but not a direct answer.
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I’m a lover, lots of love to give
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My dad told me this when I was first out of the navy, he said: “if it floats flies or f**ks rent it, if you want love get a dog”. Of course that was from a man who was married 4 times.
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Wow…people are reading my mind and your posts feel like a thought I just had.
I agree with being a mother. My God if any woman reads this and has no child let me say what only
1 woman ever said out load in front of me in my entire life because we forget that it is a secret …
“My child is the first person I ever loved more than anyone including myself and for the first time I
Found purpose in helping her find her happiness and purpose in life” . I was 38 and kicking myself at 45 wishing I had started 25 yrs earlier and had 20 more. Never a day gone by that I needed for myself…that said, being older I was plenty bored by spoiling me. My only regret which I knew at age 11 and still made was to involve a relationship of marriage. It was not needed and it destroyed
Everything out of jealousy. It is easier to share a child with a complete stranger.
Romantic love….that has always been a tough one for me. I’m super simple and everyone needs to so much drama. I don’t need some great romance …I need simple. Today I ran across some website for a country store in Vermont and it took me back to a memory of this guy I met in Reno working that I flew to NY to see. He was a contractor, cute and we spent the weekend in a Vermont cabin ( his or a friends) not some crazy sex weekend but sex I still recall fondly spooning on the couch watching Lion King we rented at a little Vermont store….Trust me lion king is HOT …try it and see. We must have had sex 5 times before we finished those 2 tapes. That was 25 plus yrs ago and the thought of that sexy contractor in that Vermont Cabin who I thought I had forgotten came flooding back like it was yesterday ……so for me NOTHING HAS CHANGED
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I would love to settle down.
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never been married and still hopeful. 
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What's love got to do with it?
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I love HX
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I fell in love
With hx
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Might never happen and thats ok 
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Love ❤️
It’s not changed for me yet.
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Does LOVE exist anymore?
What does love mean?
Sometimes, I confuse a long hot time with love.
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What does the lovely Queen of Rock N Roll have to say about love, "What's Love Got To Do With It"
And what's the Goddess of Pops opinion, "Do you believe in life after love"
The Phantom what do you say about this, "Love me"
Trina how about you how do you feel about love,"Dumps in tha trunk, thighs like what Aint there no hoe got more booty in the butt..."
Okay. The Darkness, "I Believe In A Thing Called Love"
Tina Turner - What's Love Got To Do With It
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oGpFcHTxjZs
Cher - Believe
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nZXRV4MezEw&list=RDnZXRV4MezEw&start_radio=1&pp=ygUMY2hlciBiZWxpZXZloAcB
(warning loud scream at the beginning, not hyperlinked)
The Phantom - Love me
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8zgsIdMa8qA&list=RD8zgsIdMa8qA&start_radio=1
Trina - Pull Over
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wxnv2vtyFpk
The Darkness - I Believe In A Thing Called Love
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tKjZuykKY1I
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Randy and LngndSR ..I am in the same boat!
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From Joni Mitchell’s Both Sides Now
Probably one of best lyrics ever (written in 1966)
“ Moons and Junes and Ferris wheels
The dizzy dancing way that you feel
As every fairy tale comes real
I've looked at love that way
But now it's just another show
And you leave 'em laughing when you go
And if you care, don't let them know
Don't give yourself away
I've looked at love from both sides now
From give and take and still somehow
It's love's illusions that I recall
I really don't know love
I really don't know love at all”
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Over the years my view of love has stripped itself down and rebuilt itself in ways I never expected. I used to think love was supposed to feel safe....predictable.....shaped a certain way if you did everything right. I thought it came with rules and blueprints and clean lines. I don’t believe that anymore.
I’ve learned that loving anything is reckless in its own way. You hand someone the exact coordinates to hurt you and It’s terrifying but necessary. Something in me would starve without it.
I’ve learned that love never shows up the way I thought it would. It doesn’t announce itself. It comes in sideways through imperfect people doing the best they can with whatever tools they have. Sometimes that’s a whole set of steady hands.... Sometimes it’s one rusty screwdriver.
I’ve learned that love doesn’t disappear just because the relationship does. It shifts rooms inside you. It quiets down or changes shape, but it doesn’t die. Everyone I’ve loved still lives somewhere in me, not in the same place they used to, but present all the same.
I’ve learned that sex and love aren’t the same language. Love can deepen sex or break it apart completely when trust collapses...sex can exist without love while love can survive without sex.
I’ve learned how easily you can fall in love with someone once you’ve seen them human, and how easily love fades when the version of them you held onto disappears. Love evolves. It demands movement. If you don’t grow with it, you end up holding ghosts.
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If only love was as simple as science to figure out we’d all be happy.
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I love this blog and all of the perspectives shared. Similar situation as LngbdSR as well.
I used to laugh at that quote “if it floats flies or f**ks rent it, if you want love get a dog”.
I love it, but I'm not laughing anymore.
Sonya7's one-liner is just as profound.
If Love where a personality, how would you describe it? I did this exercise before with others and the results, frankly, were unsettling to me.
It's like having a Top Secret clearance and knowing about stuff you really don't want to know about.
Sonya7's one-liner is profound.
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Love, over the years?
I remember, young high school love was seeing a really cute girl look at you...
I met a girl in junior high school, and I found out where she was going to high school.
I ended getting transferred there (10th grade).
Back then, I don't think boys and girls mixed very much.
College years was a new empty canvas.
But for me, attraction meant nothing.
Everything was transactional. And I was in the wrong class.
Then, it was keep your eyes in your head.
As long as there wasn't conversation, there wasn't hope.
Mid thirties... Arrangements coming out of the woodworks.
I was single, like that was a curse to be cured.
I was stable. Bought my own place. Had a little savings.
Life was comfortable. Cook what I want, savings was a priority.
Quite a few times: "have I got a girl for you!"
That was really years that married people were upset that time was mine. Living alone. Starting to get things that were important to me. And still putting away the greens. Haha, I was asked, "do I have a green card?" American Express? Yes. Visa? Yes, MasterCard too.
Oh... I misunderstood. The multicolored card issued by U.S. Immigration Services! No, I don't have one. I'm a natural born Californian. U.S. Passport.
Funny, how I became a commodity.
In my '50s, I decided that I should expand my social circle. And if I felt someone was pleasing to my values, and socially available, let's see what happens.
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LngbdSR is one of the ultra-left liberal kind of guys.
How's it hanging at Bolsa Chica Hodaddy ?
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I have always been in love with the idea of love. It would be an honor to spend the rest of my life with one person who will give me the privilege of being intimate with their most vulnerable selves. People don't realize that in order to truly love you have to love yourself first. Genuinely, unconditionally and authentically. Some people think that love is how a person makes you feel when love is in fact seeing the full sides of someone and actively still wanting to be there and care for that person (you made me mad but I still want to work through it... I don't agree with that but I love you enough to understand where you're coming from... I will acknowledge what you're upset about and do my best to change that OR compromise to make us both happy) . I can't wait to get married and spend the rest of my life with a faithful and open minded person who will allow me the opportunities to breathe life into all that they have to offer. Sharing everlasting memories with a person that you want to see happy is a beautiful thing. Love is pushing your mate to always be their best while being their anchor when they cant. But also I love sex so that person has to at least be able to provide it 2 times a week at minimum .
For me love and sex are not the same but if you love me you'll create the discipline needed to withhold those desires or be honest in regards to them. Seeing how many married men step outside of their marriage instead of being truly honest in what their needs are is why I have recently lost all hope. You can't say that you love your partner if you're not honest in regards to your actions because you know that they'd be upset. (plus if you know that they'd get upset then that means what you're doing is wrong lol)
I want to experience selfless love but I dont think people truly know what unconditional means.
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The ultra-cynic in me would say that love is the mechanism Homo sapiens has evolved to keep males and females from terminating each other long enough to produce and raise offspring.
The optimist in me would say that love is an ideal that would be wonderful if it ever happens.
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